Our Story
by ilovedegrassilots
Summary: Was Clare willing to surpass 'needing space' and continue her relationship with Eli?
1. Chapter 1

_*Eli's perspective*_

Without Clare, thing's were terrible. Every time I just needed to talk to someone I'd pick up my phone to call Clare and then I'd realize that she wasn't someone I could count on, at the moment. We were taking a break, it's what she asked for. I've been writing recently, too and trying to work on stories because I've had a lot on my mind. I even wrote a letter to Clare a few days ago and I sent it out.

I don't know if she'll except my apology or want to talk, but I hope it doesn't make things worse.

I didn't have any plans, so I decided to text Adam.  
><em>Meet me at The Dot? - Eli<br>_

A few minutes later my phone lit up - it was a text from Adam.  
><em>Sure thing! Meet you there in 20. - Adam<em>

I put on my black vest and shoes and headed downstairs. "Hey I'm going to The Dot to see Adam, I'll be home later," I opened the front door and headed out to The Dot. I got Morty's keys taken away for a week or so because of the "gun incident" with Clare, so I had to walk every where.

_*Clare's perspective*_

I didn't have much to do since I requested for some space from Eli and Adam's usually with him or busy with school clubs. I decided to read a little, when I heard a shout from the kitchen, "Hey Clare, can you go grab the mail."

"Sure." I grabbed my jacket and headed out. I opened up the mailbox and looked at what we got. I was skimming the envelopes when I suddenly came across one that had said - _Clare Edwards. _It felt rather light and I noticed the return address had the name, _Eli Goldsworthy_. Usually I get excited to open mail, but once I saw Eli's name I got this slight feeling in my stomach. The kind of feeling when you know something's wrong. I headed back towards the house and threw the mail on the counter, "I'm going for a walk."

I started down the street and began to open up the envelope.


	2. Chapter 2:  The Letter

Clare,

You told me we needed a break. You told me that everything was because of Julia. You told me that everything I did was for her.

But I thought otherwise. I thought you were wrong, Clare. I thought you were only bringing back Julia as an excuse to leave me. I thought you were only bringing up the past to hurt me. I was wrong, though and you. You were right.

Every day, from the minute I woke up to the minute I rested my head, my past haunted me. My past reminded me of what I was like, what I did; that everything that happened was my fault. I felt guilty for loving you, Clare. I felt guilty for having feelings for anybody but her.I tried to keep her out of my head, but no matter how hard I tried she was always sitting in the back of my mind.

But you wanna know the worst part? Her watching over me knowing I was falling in love with somebody who wasn't her. Her watching over me, seeing me be happy after her death. That was the worst part, Clare. So I got clingy, suffocating, I got too attached. I did it to tell myself that being close to you would make everything better. I thought that if you and I were closer then I wouldn't lose you, the way I lost Julia. I did it thinking that my haunting past would go away. I did it to prove to Julia that I've moved on, found somebody new, reached the next chapter in my book.

And you telling me that everything was because of Julia only helped me realize that you were right. All my actions were due to the fact that I lost somebody, somebody that meant the most to me. Everything was because of her, it was because I blamed myself for that night, I blamed myself for her death. I blamed myself for everything, until the day I met you. You've only helped me, Clare. You've always tried to make things better; you've always tried to make our relationship the best it could be. You take things in a way I've never approached.

So it leaves me to this. I'm sorry. Clare, I'm sorry about how things ended, I'm sorry I didn't listen to you when you told me you needed space, I'm sorry for getting so emotionally attached, I'm sorry for everything. I know that the two of us have had it tough in the past, and I know that sometimes people need time alone. I guess I hadn't realized this before. I wish I had, maybe things would've ended differently. I know for a fact that life gives you things that you need to hold onto. And you know the very best thing that life gave me? You. You were brought into my life for a reason, and I guess I held on too tight. There are so many paths in life, and sometimes you have to choose the one you think is right. We started off down the same path but I guess somewhere along the line there was a fork in the road. You took the side I didn't. I guess I can't be too upset because while we did last, you gave me so much. You made me realize the good in life; you helped me understand myself so much more. You made me feel so alive, Clare, and I thank you for that.

I guess the easiest thing to do now is to let go. I'll give you time and space. Just like you asked. Let's forget about the past, and look into the future. Maybe we were just two puzzle pieces that didn't fit. Find the right person, Clare, and hold onto them forever. But don't hold on too tight. Don't make the same mistake I made with you. I'll always be missing you, and I'll always be thinking about you. So this is my apology; my apology for everything. I love you, always, Clare and I'm sorry. So for now, this is our goodbye.


	3. Chapter 3

*Eli's perspective*

Taking walks everywhere sort of helped me in a way; it allowed me to get fresh and to think. Sometimes thinking led to Clare, which didn't help much because I was trying to get over her, but it was hard not to think about somebody who meant the most to me. It's sort of like how I felt when Julia died. Everything reminded me of her, everything brought me back to our memories and the time we spent together. I guess that's just the way my mind works. And I can't say that I don't agree with it because spending everyday with Clare was something I was so used to. It was something I enjoyed doing, something I looked forward to everyday. And now that we don't spend all of our time together it's hard not to think about her. I try my best not to, though. For her. I do it to help her, to move on and give her some space. Just like she had asked.

*Clare's perspective*

As I read the letter tears formed in my eyes. And just as I finished reading the last couple of words written down on the sheet of paper, the tears flowed down my cheeks. I could feel myself getting red and the nervous feeling I had felt when I first saw the name, Eli Goldsworthy, came back to me. It came back for a reason. It came back because now I knew everything, and now I had to figure out a way to deal with it.

I wasn't completely sure if I was just going to forgive Eli just because he wrote me this letter or if I wanted to stay on this break for a little longer, to help me gather my thoughts more. After all the days spent with Eli, after everything we've been through it was hard to go a day without hearing his voice. Asking him for some space was the hardest decision I've ever made.

Reading Eli's feelings and Eli's pain helped me understand so much more. Now I have to decide what I'm going to do. I always knew decisions were tough, but I never realized that choosing Eli or moving on could change my life forever.

*Eli's perspective*

I had been walking for what seemed like forever and I still wasn't at The Dot. I pulled out my phone to text Adam, I wanted to let him know I'd be a little later then planned.

_Hey dude, I'll be there in a bit, running a little late. Sorry! -Eli_

After a couple of seconds my phone lit up;  
><em>No worries! I'll save us a table and order drinks. See you in a little. -Adam<em>

I was to busy looking at my phone that I forgot to cross the street. I walked over to the edge of the sidewalk and looked to see if a car was coming. There were no cars but I did see something. Walking in the same direction I was heading.

It was Clare.

I wasn't exactly sure what to do. I didn't know if she had read my letter or not. I didn't know if I should go over and say hello or continue to The Dot and forget I ever saw her. I had to make a decision fast because she was approaching and I had to cross the street.

- _Say hello Eli, what's the harm in that? -_

- _Wait I can't say hello. What if she still wants space. What if she hasn't gotten my letter. What if she's done with me for good. -_

There were so many _what if's_ running through my mind. I wasn't exactly sure what to do, but I knew I had to make up my mind quickly. I checked again to see if any cars were coming, then I ran across the street. Her head was still down, and I decided to continue walking. I didn't want to make anything worse than it already was. I scurried down the street to The Dot, forgetting I ever saw her.

*Clare's perspective*

I wasn't sure what I should do with the letter. I didn't know if I should throw it away and act like I never got it or if fold it up and put it away and just deal with it later. There were to many choices rolling around in my head. I glanced up as I was thinking about what I should do. I realized I was about 5 minutes away from The Dot, I had completely forgotten to turn around and head home a few roads back. I looked ahead of me and I saw a boy in all black, with long black hair. With no doubt, I knew it was Eli; I could point him out in a heartbeat.

After seeing him ahead of me, more decisions and thoughts consumed me.. Never mind having to decide what I wanted to do with the letter, now I have to make up my mind on what to do with Eli. The boy who had been causing me stress yet loved me without a doubt in his mind was standing in front of me. He was heading in the same direction as I was, it was either I turn around and forget about going to The Dot or continue walking his way.

_- That's it, I don't think I can deal with him right now. I did ask him for space, right? -  
><em>I stopped walking, I stared ahead and then glanced over my shoulder in the opposite direction. I turned my body and began walking home.

_- Why should I let him ruin my day. If I wanna go to The Dot, then I should be able to go to The Dot. -  
><em>I spun back around and headed to the The Dot.

I began to think that maybe talking to Eli wouldn't be so bad. We were best friends, we dated, we told each other things we've never told anybody else, so having a conversation about our relationship and where things are headed wouldn't be to extraordinary. It's not like I'm going to tell him we can be together again and push our problems aside. We could just talk for a few minutes and discuss the direction our relationship_._

I hurried down the street, seconds passed and I was approaching Eli. I wasn't sure if this was the right decision, but I knew that we had to make things right. "Hey, Eli."

_*Eli's perspective*_

I was just a few minutes away from The Dot and I heard my name being shouted. Without thinking twice, I knew it had been Clare.

I stopped walking and as I spun around, Clare was standing two feet away from me. The two of us weren't really sure how to start off the conversation. But just as I opened my mouth to speak, Clare spoke, "-okay, so I got your letter."

I was getting butterflies in my stomach as I stood across from her, listening to her voice. I hadn't her it for a while now; we haven't had a conversation for quite some time. The tone of her voice was soft and angelic, I couldn't help but smile. But my smile faded when I heard her mention the letter. I wasn't sure if sending it to her was the right thing to do and how she'd take it.

She continued on, "And I think we should talk."

I wanted to grab her, hold her in my arms and gently kiss her but I knew it wasn't going to be that easy.

I stood there looking at her for a brief minute, "Alright. Let's talk."


End file.
